Monday, February 24, 2014

Frustration in Delays and Goals

What a cheerful way to title a post. I know, I know.

And I have no pictures? Blogger strike number two.

My, where to start? It's been over a week since my Valentines post. In the last week I have been nearly everywhere except for here on this blog. Well, not quite. =) 

This touring business has been pretty hectic these last ten days. I had such high hopes for all that I thought I could accomplish this month, and this past week, in particular, but I am realizing that even though I worked hard at it, I
A) didn't work hard enough
B) aimed way too high
C) totally underestimated the commitments I would have with our touring schedule

Ever been there, my friend? Sometimes I feel that this is the story of my life. 
Dream up grand, big ideas. Write lists that stretch for miles and miles with ambition and zeal and energy. Run into a totally different schedule than what I was planning and multiple unexpected delays, especially when on tour.
And then have a little mini crash with the dust of frustration billowing around me.

{just being honest here}

There's nothing quite so discouraging as missing most of your goals and having all that ambition come crashing to the ground.

All that said. There was no guest post. I have yet to experience the wonders of owning Lightroom. Three of the five books on my February reading list have been virtually untouched. There weren't even close to fifteen posts. And so on. 

Ah, I am so thankful that tomorrow (or next month, rather!) is a clean slate. I'm learning my lesson though and I won't allow myself to be so ambitious for next month either, because most of it will also be spent on the road. 

It's a hard thing to describe, this road life. I'm not really sure how to explain it but there is no such thing as schedule. There is no such thing as routine. Sometimes it feels like one huge jumble of instruments, siblings, belongings, and more towns, churches, and people than I can possibly remember or keep up with. I'm compiling a list of sarcastic comebacks to use on the next person who says to me "Oh, thats SO COOL that you get to spend the winter vacationing with your family down south!" Vacationing? Gracious-there may be many words to call my life but "vacation" is not it!

I also apologize that its taking so long for the upcoming posts I mentioned here. I haven't forgotten about them; they are both in the making and saved in drafts, but to make a long story short, the one post needs some pictures to accompany it and I can't take the pictures til I get home because some of the outfits I need for the pictures are at home (long explanation there!), and the other post ended up being way bigger than what I was thinking it would be so I'm attempting to break it down into a series-type deal and sort everything out into the proper order. And posts like that are HARD to do when internet time is limited to a quick, timed stop at Caribou, or hacking into the Lowes wifi for ten blessed minutes while brother dear is inside making a purchase and my minutes are ticking away. 

We are approaching our busiest stretch of all for this tour, so I will probably be absent even more. However, in the midst of everything else God has provided an exciting upcoming opportunity for me (stay tuned!) which will involve quite a bit of time in five different airports, so maybe during those amazing hours of solitude I will be able to cook up a whole storm of posts and be back to normal again! =)

In closing...I've been reading lately in the Old Testament, about the children of Israel and their journey to Canaan. What a challenge it has been to see the good in life, and to BELIEVE God's promises to us! 
I want to be like Caleb and Joshua who saw the grapes, and not the giants. They could have chosen to be distracted like the other ten spies and focused on the giants and the "impossibility" of conquering the mighty cities, but instead they saw the land for what it was-God's promised gift to them-and they choose to believe God's promise and GO FOR IT! That's what I want-to choose to see the GOOD in everything. I want to find joy  in seeing His hand working in my life, and in the lives of those around me. 

{even when we're stuck on a 45ft bus and this farm girl misses that good old farm air and Iowa snow like everything!}

Be blessed, friends! Let's go conquer those Canaanites! =)

-chels

17 comments:

  1. Hey Chelsy —

    I know exactly how you feel. I had to laugh when I read the comment about "vacationing down South". We are preparing to leave on our first down South tour in about a month, and we know it is not going to be a vacation, despite what people at concerts tell us! (Will people ever understand that just because you travel in a singing ministry with your family does not particularly guarantee sightseeing and relaxation? No, probably not *sigh*...unless they experience it themselves. :) )

    Just want to encourage you, as I have found myself in similar situations (mile-long lists...yep, can relate to those). Take a deep, calming breath — a good singer's deep breath now! :) I know I often feel guilty at not completing my ever-expanding lists, not fulfilling expectations I've placed on myself or required of me on schedule. (Ugh!) The guilt and frustration (perfect word, by the way) are difficult to keep from poisoning our joy; it's hard to say, "Okay Lord, not my schedule but Yours!" when we are feeling so miserable and upset, making our disrupted schedule and daily life even worse than it can be. But when we do (consistently) lift up our broken schedules and unfulfilled expectations to Him, there comes an eventual relief and peace.

    I pray the Lord would refresh you and give you joy as you are challenged to be flexible and are stretched in so many ways. May He fill you with peace as you minister, not only here on your blog, but in every interaction you have on the road. And, don't apologize for the slow down in blogs — we understand (well, I know I do, at least the traveling life thing!).

    Sorry for the extended rant; just wanted to share a couple encouraging (hopefully) words and to let you know that I'm lifting you up in prayer. :)

    His Truly,
    Taylor

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    1. thank-you SO much for that encouragement, Taylor! I know that you know exactly what I'm talking about, being in a traveling family band as well and all. =)
      thanks for taking the time to comment and share your thoughts with me; it blessed me!
      -chels

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  2. Wow. Knowing how busy y'all have been, it's a wonder you ever found time to post. :) If it makes you feel any better, new posts on the Allen Famiy blog have been absent for quite some time as well. I know how you feel right now. ;) Anyway, thanks for the encouragement! Love you and your family so much and am keeping you in my prayers. By the way if it helps any, what I do with my 'longer' posts is type them in my notes then copy and paste them to my blog drafts. That way you can work on it all you want without having to have Internet. Anyway, love ya! God bless!
    ~AbbyJoy

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    1. Yes, I have done that too occasionally (written my posts in documents and then saved them for when I have wifi). great idea!

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    2. Well that's a good thing they are saved for when u have wifi trying just get just at less tone bar of wifi I understand bout that hole wifi thing so I kown u feel trying get the stuff u need to get done when time is so limited intil u get to ur place that u don't have to worry bout the wifi for how much time u have be for u kown u when time is up and can't wait for more blogs yay and if I wore u I would bring all the outfits with me but I can understand how crazy it is when u guys are packing anyways love y'all and ur blogs and God bless y'all =)

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  3. yeow we are on the same page -- I've been thinking lately about all my lofty goals for February as the month here is almost done...and feeling discouraged as well. Because I also aimed too high and didn't work hard enough. Thanks for being real, Chels. #allinthistogether

    and Iowa seriously misses you too. especially a short small town girl. ;)

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  4. Your posts always make me smile :) I needed to hear this today, thank you for being so transparent and posting this! I always wonder how your family manages being on the road for so long (let's just say I know from first hand experience how crazy it can get living in an RV with 13 people for a few weeks....and we were on vacation!:) I can see you guys are a blessing to many! Safe travels:)
    Kerri

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  5. Hey Chelsy. Can completely relate with your post! I love goals and planning, but then life spins out of my control and I wonder how on earth will I accomplish all of it. Life just keeps flying by... Keep pressing on! :D

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    1. thanks girl! And just so you know...its on my list to answer your email; I did get it and I haven't forgotten about it!

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  6. You've struck a chord with me my friend. This year I started out with many fantastic goals and plans for our family... but they were soon all put on hold when we found out we were expecting! This pregnancy, I've learned to just be happy to get the 3 little ones up and dressed and fed for the day. God has been teaching me to be thankful for every little thing and to be submissive to His perfect will. Praying for you during this busy time! Though I'm sure you've made some great family memories along the way, I can't imagine how hard it would be to be contained in a bus. Since we moved to Grand Rapids we've been in a townhouse with a road right out our front door and a road right out our back door. As a country girl I feel so trapped some days, but I know God has placed me here and will call me out at His perfect time. Thank you for reminding me to see the grapes. :) -Kayla

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    1. praying for you, Kayla! I'm sure your life is crazy too with all those little ones and a pregnancy on top of it, but God will BLESS you guys for your decision to accept the blessing of children! Thanks for commenting!

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  7. thanks for the post. I will be praying for you. love you so much! -Sarah

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  8. Hi chels hope y'all haveing fun making great memories and singing and sharing the words of our Lord Jesus Christ that a lot of people need These days while their are all stuck and glue down and when they sin so many times and some of them forgotten u they even or have our Almighy God so that's so good that u doing something so that great feeling inside u will last a lifetime love y'all and God belss u guys and praying for y'all =)

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  9. Hey Chels! Thanks for your comment on my blog! It's great hearing from fellow waitresses who understand the joys and frustrations of serving. =) I work at Mrs. Yoder's Kitchen in Mt. Hope, Ohio.
    Btw, I love reading your blog!

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  10. Such a good post! I was tracking with you all the way...up until you mentioning missing snow. ;)

    Truly, though, I think your heart is in the right place, even if your goals haven't been scratched off the 'to-do' list, yet. It can also be a good thing to fail once in a while, as it reminds us just how reliant on God we really are, as well as the fact that our goals are not always His plans for us. :) And just because your February goals were not accomplished does not mean that you weren't productive or diligent in other areas! I personally don't think I could do what you all do. I think touring seems like such hard work...blessed, for sure, but still not easy. I commend you for your sacrifice to follow God's calling for your family. Don't get too down on yourself. I know God is smiling down on your efforts to make the most of this life for Him.

    Love you, girl!
    ali

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