Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Road Life Comedy {Part One}

(photography credit StyleLife Photography)

Most of you already know this, but for those of you who don't, I am somewhat of a "transplant". Half of the year I live on a farm with my family. The other half of the year I travel the world, quite literally. Each lifestyle is full of action and I really do love them both, most of the time.
But the road life in particular seems to lend itself to some hilarious moments.
I think it's because we meet so so SO many different people, and whenever you meet that many different people, you are bound to have some, ahem, "different" situations crop up.
Now, we do have an unwritten rule that "what happens on the bus stays on the bus", meaning that there are just certain things that happen on the road that I won't ever be sharing with the general public. But, some things are appropriate to share, and since people are constantly asking me about life on the road, I thought y'all might enjoy a little "inside scoop" of sorts on some of the funny things that happen every now and then.
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*Little boy who was talking to me at our product table after a concert,
Him: "So are any of you orphans?" (I think he meant to say "adopted"=))

*Little girl, also at the product table, a different time,
Her: "So how old are you?"
Me: "I'm twenty-four."
Her: "Wow...twenty-four and NOT MARRIED?" (in an "I can't believe my ears" tone)
Me: (trying not to laugh) "Yes, dear child, it is possible."

*Picking at a hang nail that starts bleeding profusely, and the next song up is a piano song that I am supposed to play on. I do my best to play but its hard when my finger is bleeding and blood is going all over the keyboard keys. I end up with a bloody keyboard.

*Very accidentally meeting the pastor of a particular church in my PJ's one memorable night. One of my most humbling experiences to date.
(this is what comes from deciding to set up a church at 11pm one night. We were all in our PJs but no one was "supposed" to be there so who cares, right? As we were in the middle of singing all of the crazy tunes that we sing when no one else is around, possibly complete with several crazy dance moves, all whilst setting up...in walks the pastor. I agree-what is a pastor doing in his church at 11 o'clock at night?! There was nothing to be done but introduce ourselves, PJs and wild pew dance and all.

*Getting hiccups in the middle of a song. #worstfeelingever

*Eating peanut m&m's right before going on stage and feeling bits and pieces still sticking to the inside of my mouth and corners of my lips...fifteen minutes later.

*Finally switching my purity ring from my left hand to my right hand because it was just getting really ridiculous how many people were wanting to start a conversation about my engagement. #goodgrief

*The friend that calls and tells you that they are "sending" a special "someone" to your concert. Whereupon you resolve to call in sick that night....and your family protests loudly for more reasons than one.

*Being served sloppy joes three meals in a row. it was yummy! But it was just funny too.

*Times when an anonymous Bontrager writes out the concert song list and adds different words to make us laugh, but we don't realize the change until we are in the middle of the concert.
example: "Goodnight Smooch" instead of "Goodnight Kiss".
Also there are quite a few of us right now that are more or less in "that time of life",  so recently someone wrote on the songlist "Someone You Can MEET" instead of "Someone You Can Reach"
Just for a joke. =)

*A certain individual getting so involved in their book on the front row that they don't realize it is time for their solo until another sibling comes to the mic and calls them up in front of everyone
#embarrassingforthem #funnyforus

*Backing up on stage to move out of someone's way and backing right into a mic stand that was left out. This is followed by what seemed like an agonizingly long time of arms, instrument, and legs flailing as I try to regain my balance. Thank-goodness this ended in me still being upright.
(although barely)

*A guy comes up to the cd table and says "So what's the purpose of that thing on your head?"
 (boho styled headband)
In my mind I said "Excuse me, sir? Is this still the land of the free or not?"
But in reality I was sweet and said, "Well, it's for decoration."

*I am sitting on the front row of a church. It is literally one minute before the concert is going to start and I suddenly FREAK OUT because I realize I forgot to remove my week-old red nail polish remnants! How could I have forgotten? At this stage in time my nails look like I'm still in that three yr old stage when they just let the polish wear off and don't care how bad it looks. I mentally resolve NEVER to paint my fingernails again...it's just too much upkeep.

*But then whats even worse...is we did the concert, (me with bad nails and all) and after the concert I totally forget about my nails. Until the next night when I am at a different church and on the front row once again, one minute before the concert, and I catch a glimpse of my horrible nails and barely manage to suppress a shriek, realizing that I once again forgot to remove the polish! And although I didn't think it possible last night, in reality, tonight the nails look even worse.
Brother to the rescue loaned me his pocket knife and I FRANTICALLY begin scraping those nails. I wasn't able to get it all off in the one minute I had but all through the concert, every spare minute, I was trying to pick off nail polish remnants. Never again.

*Out and about one day, at Subway, and the lady behind the counter begins a conversation with me as I'm digging in my purse trying to locate the correct amount of change.
Her: "Are you Italian?"
Me: "No."
Her: "Are you Greek?"
Me: "No."
Her:"Well then, what are you?"
Me: (counting out my change and not thinking) "Um, I'm part German. And part Indian. And...uh, part regular?"
Whereupon we all laughed-me, the lady, and the guy making my sub.
Regular? Where did that come from? No idea...

*Having an eyelash stuck inside my eyelid for the entire concert, and being unable to do anything about it. #painful

*Thinking about something else entirely, and skipping to the ending of the song while siblings continue singing the correct part...and then we all stop and laugh and I try to recollect what song we were even singing because I was seriously in another world. The audience is sitting there obviously not getting the joke and we are all just DYING laughing although trying to pull ourselves together. I tried to explain to the audience what happened but obviously it isn't possible to communicate correctly so finally I just manage to squeak out, "I think we will just move to the next song" and you do just that, while your parents are in the front row dying of mortification at their scatterbrained daughter. (Unfortunately this scenario has happened to us more than once. And I'm not always the one at fault either...)

*Thinking if I had a dollar for every grandma who told me that I needed to meet her grandson...I'd be one rich lady! (hehe)
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Ha, I'm laughing again as I finish up this post, re-living some of these moments!
By the way, I threw in "part one" with my title, thinking that I might have to do another post like this after I collect a number of stories again... 

Please leave a comment and let me know if you liked the post and would like to see more like this!
-Chels

52 comments:

  1. OH MY WORD. I just died, this made my day. I think my favorite is the boho headband as I can just SEE your thought process..LAUGH OUT LOUD.

    yes, part 2. #PLEASE :)

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    1. I agree all of them are my favorites hehe oh chelsy what blogger/we do with her :)

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  2. Oh.my.word, Chelsy! You had me in STITCHES!! =D
    I'm really enjoying all of your posts! =) =)
    Keep it up! =)

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  3. Yes, I would DEFINITELY love more of these posts!! They are so fun! =) You + your sisters are beautiful! ~Kara Beth

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  4. I loved it! - Melodie from WA

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  5. That was really fun to read! I switched my purity ring over to my right hand during the Big Sandy conference because I was attending a few of the couples sessions and people (some of them younger siblings) were starting to get a little suspicious... I moved it back afterward because it's slightly small and has worn two unsightly grooves into my left ring finger already... I hope they fade/are covered by my engagement ring when the time comes :-/
    It would definitely be fund to hear more!

    I really enjoyed seeing y'all at the conference last week :-D
    <3 and Blessings,
    Laura

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  6. Thank you for some great laughs! I enjoyed your post very much and I vote for a part 2. :D

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  7. An I just the picture up at top y'all look so cute :) hugs Lov u guys an God bless u guys :)

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  8. Chelsy, you totally had me LAUGHING!!!! WHAT stories and YES, I would LOVE to see more post like this!! :-D Life it full of surprises huh?! :) >>MARY<<

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  9. I LOVED it! Please post a post like this every week! I loved the Subway story, too funny. Are you really part German and Indian?
    ~A Bible Bee contestant who stalks your blog (but not in a creepy way!)

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  10. Oh my goodness! Well what would life be without those crazy moments? :P
    Must be amazing being able to tour the whole country!!!!

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  11. Yes, yes, YES!! I loved this!! Totally made me laugh... I had to read it out loud to the others because we can just SO relate. :) Thanks for brightening my day with a chuckle! And yes please to Part 2... :)

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  12. LOVED it, Chelsy! This was so funny, and yes, I would absolutely love to see another post like this! What a creative post idea, too! Thank you for sharing your bus adventures with us!:)
    ~ Morgan R.

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  13. Hahahah! This post was so funny. :) I was laughing so much at everything you wrote. You definitely should do another one of these!

    ~Em.

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  14. Yeah Chels! Me and my sister just got done reading it and laughed the whole way through! I say you do it as many times as you want :)

    P.S. Don't get embarrassed about leftover nail-polish. :) You are a servant girl... and no time to remove that polish proves it! To me, that's all that counts. :)

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  15. Oh, thank you Chelsy! I have never commented here before, but I had to say that I have had a very stressful day, and this was just what I needed.
    Your posts are always very encouraging and I really look up to you!
    Love,
    Hannah (15)

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  16. Chels!!! #nowordsneeded This post is hilarious! Thanks for sharing...yes, I think a part two would be in order sometime! So the ones that made me laugh hardest were the "changing the song list titles", "nail polish" and
    "part regular"!!!:) Oh, and I totally know about the comments about your age/marital status=) Except after I answer, I get "You're only {whatever age I am at the time}??!"
    blessings!

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  17. Awesome post. I loved it and a part 2 is an absolute must :-) Sounds like you have a full, happy and exciting life!! Beautiful picture. Y'all are so purdy ;-)

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  18. yes, please...this was great!!

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  19. The picture is lovely!! All you girls are so pretty. The post is awesome as usual, I loved reading tidbits of your life on the road. I was curios at what age you/your gamily starts wearing makeup?
    -Nicole

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    1. We were allowed to start wearing basic makeup when we were fourteen I think...its been awhile so I'm trying to remember!
      I wore a little every now and then at fourteen, but I didn't start wearing full makeup regularly until I was eighteen, just because I was a tomboy and didn't really care about it much until eighteen. =)

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  20. Wow, now I felt your embarrassment just reading this! Haha, loved it though! :D

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  21. Hahaha!! This made my day! I'm laughing so hard. Sounds like so much fun! I hope I can meet you some time! (Come to NY please!) ;)
    -Angel

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    1. We're coming this summer, in July! Where do you live?

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  22. Oh my, I was shaking with laughter through the whole post:) #remindsmeof10PeasinaPod BTW Are you coming to Northern WI this year??

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    1. No...but we are coming to northern MN + northern MI! Depending where you live it might not be that far off...

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  23. May I ask, what color of eyes Allison has? Just curious. :)

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    1. Thanx 4 the reply. I love your blue eyes! I've got green/brown eyes so its a mixture of the color of yours and Allison's. :) ~Kara Beth

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  24. Got some kicks outta this one! Yes, part 2, please! Also how do you whiten your teeth? (Weird question, I know.) Love your blog!!

    Lauren

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  25. Oh my word, these were interesting and funny! Especially the part at Subway. ;) Looking forward to reading some more!

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  26. This is so great! I definitely vote for more posts in this series - it was a total day-brightener to read these and you are such a great writer. The headband one, haha! I wore a boho-style headband on Sunday and got a mixed reaction of "LOVE it"...to..."what IS that?!" ;) Btw, love the picture at the top and can't wait to see the rest of your new family pictures! The sneak peeks look fabulous! Such an awesome answered prayer that the photographers were in the same area at the same time. Thanks so much for these 10 day tandem posts - I've been so blessed + am saddened that it ends tomorrow. Noooo. But thank you for each and every post! Thankful!

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  27. Thanx for the post Chels. I would love another one. : ) -Katrina-

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  28. These were so funny! Please do a part 2!
    I loved the "So are any of you orphans?" that is so funny. It reminds me of something that one of my siblings would say.
    Your backing into the mic reminds me of something that happened to me once. Some friends decided that they wanted me to sing with them at our church one week and I thought "Wow! That sounds fun!" I love singing. Even though our church is very small and I've gone to it for fifteen years I was a bit nervous about singing up front. We only had like two weeks to practice and I almost backed out twice but a friend kept insisting that I was needed;).....anyways the Sunday that we were singing happened to be the week we had tons of visitors.....We needed to practice so we were practicing and some friends that were visiting we're watching and I tripped over my friends violin case right in front of them. It was not funny at the time but I sort of laugh now at how clumsy I was. LOL. I was thankful I made it to the end of the song and glad that I don't have to sing up front every week.

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  29. Loved it!! I love seeing pictures of you and your sisters, I have three sisters also. Are you the oldest out of the girls?

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    1. Yes, I am the oldest-of the girls and of all of us. =) I am 24, Allison is 20, Liz is 11, and Rebecca is 7.

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    2. Sisters make some of the best friends! My older sister Heather is 23, I am 20, Abigail is 15, and Eve is 13. Treasure every moment with them.

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  30. Haha Chelsy . . . super funny! Can't wait for part 2!!

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  31. LOVED this post, Chelsy!!! I laughed so hard! I hope you do a part two!

    Blessings,
    Sarah F.

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  32. Hi Chelsea, I really like your blog posts. They have a lot of substance. You are a great writer.

    You are also gorgeous and I have definitely thought on more than one occasion that I love your tanned skin. I hope you don't mind me asking but you mentioned that you are part indian. I was wondering how much indian blood you have in your genes? I only ask because I am married to a half-indian/half white man. Being that I am full white, our kids will be 1/4 indian. And I am just always trying to imagine how they will look if/when we start our family! It's an unusual combination so I wondered if your background might be something similar?

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    1. Thanks so much for the encouragement!
      As far as how much indian...its not very much. It is on my moms side and is back a few generations. The long and short of it is that her ancestors were Amish, and there was a sickness that went through the Indian settlement ?? years/generations ago, and most of the settlement died. The Amish took in the remaining Indian children, and there ended up being some intermarrying later on. So that's where the Indian comes in. Its pretty faint. Some of us have some of the features more than others. My sisters don't look anything indian, but a couple of my brothers and I have the higher cheekbones and darker skin, like my mom and grandpa.

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    2. That is so cool! What aback story! And yes, alli, liz, rebecca dont look indian but you, your mom , joshua,denver andcarson look very much indian!
      such a beautiful family you have!

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  33. I think it must be so embarrassing for a young woman to constantly be on guard to all these insensitive questions about marriage, etc. That must make you feel so self conscious. I am so sorry you have to put up with that! It seems you are a well known family among the conservative christian community, but at least you don't have the profile of Jana Duggar... Now THAT would get annoying!

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    1. No, it doesn't make me feel self-conscious. You just have to make a choice not to let it affect you, and move on.
      There are times it gets old, but its okay, really. There's never a dull moment for sure + always something to laugh at afterwards when we're out in the bus. =)

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  34. Thank you for sharing Chels! Our family also performs music together, just in our area, so I could definitely relate to some of these! You're definitely NOT the only one who has been in another world while simultaneously playing music. =)
    Please do some more posts like this! And come up to North Idaho sometime! =)

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  35. Love this post! Can't wait for part 2!!!
    ~Rachelle~

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  36. This was so stinking hilarious! Love it! Dying laughing!!!

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  37. DIEING of laughter right now!!! Well i guess everybody messes up at some pont in time!:) soo cute!

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  38. This was great. We were a family band for about five years and can really relate to a lot of your funnies. I actually did fall of the stage, though. The best was when my hubby was holding our 2-year-old on his lap while he ran the sound. She was exhausted that night and proceeded to go out cold. After the concert I noticed my hubby wasn't getting up to mingle and that's when I saw the puddle on the floor under his chair. His pants were soaked and my daughter was still asleep. :)

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